Sipsey Street Irregulars: Obama's Gun Grabber Rag

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Obama's Gun Grabber Rag

Phil Ochs' Draft Dodger Rag was always a favorite of mine, and it seemed like a good tune to rip off for a 21st Century rag. Here is Gun Grabber Rag from the perspective of one of the soon-to-be President's soon-to-be Domestic Defense Forces.

Obama's Gun Grabber Rag

Well, I'm just a typical liberal boy, from a typical liberal town
I believe in Gaia and Princess Leia and keepin' those Christians down.
And when it came my time to serve I knew it wouldn't be fun
But now I'm sent for disarmament to take some redneck's gun.

Sarge, I'm only eighteen and my dad's a queen, and my mom is a welfare slob
I ain't no hero, just a slacker zero and I ain't never had no job.
I'm as scared can be of gettin' shot you see, and I never heard a bullet fly.
And I know my mama voted for Obama but I don't wanna die.

The Brady Bunch will buy my lunch if I live long enough to eat
But if they really want to seize them guns, why ain't they on this street?
So here's my stack about to attack some pretty little house so dear
But bullets are flyin' and I ain't lying -- I shit my pants in fear.

Sarge, I'm only eighteen and my dad's a queen, and my mom is a welfare slob
I ain't no hero, just a slacker zero and I ain't never had no job.
I'm as scared can be of gettin' shot you see, and now I've heard a bullet fly.
And I know my mama voted for Obama but I don't wanna die.

Now I hate Larry Pratt but this is com-bat so I think you gotta see
That someone's gotta go through that door and that someone isn't me
But I wish you well, Sarge, give 'em hell, kill me a thousand or so
And if you ever get a war without blood and gore then I'll be the first to go.

Sarge, I'm only eighteen and my dad's a queen, and my mom is a welfare slob
I ain't no hero, just a slacker zero and I ain't never had no job.
I'm as scared can be of gettin' shot you see, and now I've heard a bullet fly.
And I know my mama voted for Obama but I don't wanna die.

3 comments:

j3maccabee said...: THIS is a poetic masterpiece, a rare combination of satire and parody and truth. I can visualize a music video here!!! Love it.; January 15, 2009 at 7:01 AM
Qi Ji Guang said...: Wow. Those are great lyrics! Was that the Battle of Sipsey Street?; January 15, 2009 at 12:04 PM
Anonymous said...: Wow. Wow! I think one good parody song passed around by email generating snickers is worth three weeks of "serious" posts. L. Neil Smith does banjo or guitar or somesuch, maybe he would record it for you. Consider making an album along with Poor White Boys, the Battle Hymn of the Republic parody on TLE, and who knows what else you could dream up.; January 15, 2009 at 11:21 PM

"Progress made under the shadow of the policeman's club is false progress."

I believe that liberty is the only genuinely valuable thing that men have invented, at least in the field of government, in a thousand years. I believe that it is better to be free than to be not free, even when the former is dangerous and the latter safe. I believe that the finest qualities of man can flourish only in free air – that progress made under the shadow of the policeman's club is false progress, and of no permanent value. I believe that any man who takes the liberty of another into his keeping is bound to become a tyrant, and that any man who yields up his liberty, in however slight the measure, is bound to become a slave. -- H.L. Mencken

"The Fate of Unborn Millions. . ."

"The time is now near at hand which must probably determine, whether Americans are to be, Freemen, or Slaves; whether they are to have any property they can call their own; whether their Houses, and Farms, are to be pillaged and destroyed, and they consigned to a State of Wretchedness from which no human efforts will probably deliver them. The fate of unborn Millions will now depend, under God, on the Courage and Conduct of this army-Our cruel and unrelenting Enemy leaves us no choice but a brave resistance, or the most abject submission; that is all we can expect-We have therefore to resolve to conquer or die." -- George Washington to his troops before the Battle of Long Island.

"We will not go gently . . ."

This is no small thing, to restore a republic after it has fallen into corruption. I have studied history for years and I cannot recall it ever happening. It may be that our task is impossible. Yet, if we do not try then how will we know it can't be done? And if we do not try, it most certainly won't be done. The Founders' Republic, and the larger war for western civilization, will be lost.

But I tell you this: We will not go gently into that bloody collectivist good night. Indeed, we will make with our defiance such a sound as ALL history from that day forward will be forced to note, even if they despise us in the writing of it.

And when we are gone, the scattered, free survivors hiding in the ruins of our once-great republic will sing of our deeds in forbidden songs, tending the flickering flame of individual liberty until it bursts forth again, as it must, generations later. We will live forever, like the Spartans at Thermopylae, in sacred memory.

-- Mike Vanderboegh, The Lessons of Mumbai:Death Cults, the "Socialism of Imbeciles" and Refusing to Submit, 1 December 2008

"A common language of resistance . . ."

"Colonial rebellions throughout the modern world have been acts of shared political imagination. Unless unhappy people develop the capacity to trust other unhappy people, protest remains a local affair easily silenced by traditional authority. Usually, however, a moment arrives when large numbers of men and women realize for the first time that they enjoy the support of strangers, ordinary people much like themselves who happen to live in distant places and whom under normal circumstances they would never meet. It is an intoxicating discovery. A common language of resistance suddenly opens to those who are most vulnerable to painful retribution the possibility of creating a new community. As the conviction of solidarity grows, parochial issues and aspirations merge imperceptibly with a compelling national agenda which only a short time before may have been the dream of only a few. For many Americans colonists this moment occurred late in the spring of 1774." -- T.H. Breen, The Marketplace of Revolution: How Consumer Politics Shaped American Independence, Oxford University Press, 2004, p.1.

Sipsey Street Irregulars

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Obama's Gun Grabber Rag

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