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08/19/2005 Archived Entry: "TCF still down/memories of Jasmine"

THE CLAIRE FILES MESSAGE BOARDS ARE STILL DOWN, but Bark, TCF's invisible guru, is working on it. We don't know what the problem is, but word from Bark and Elias is that it appears to be a tech glitch, not a hack.

Meantime, I want to thank Silver and Thunder for serving up extra food for thought at Wolfesblog (hope this helps ease any withdrawal symptoms TCFers might be suffering). And I'm trying to catch up on sending thanks to everybody who sent their thoughts and hopes after reading about Jasmine's death.

The thing I most want everyone to know is that although Jasmine's death was a sorrow, in an inexplicable way it was also a joy. She died not only peacefully, but happily -- lying on my bed, eating treats from my hand to the last instant, and scarcely noticing what the vet was doing. I realized afterward that the real Jasmine, that troublemaking, loving little soul, had slipped away a long, long time ago. Yesterday was a release both for me and for the sad, pain-filled shadow of Jasmine that had been hanging on. I still can't stop crying, but the tears come from an impossibly complex mix of feelings, only one of which is sorrow.

On the same day Jasmine left, a beautiful but desperate young foster dog came in. The new girl was the last thing I wanted at a moment like that. But already it feels right to give extra care to a promising young life rather than to a worn-out shell of life that was ready for release.

Posted by Claire @ 12:46 PM CST

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