Humor

A new slogan for …

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Sun, 2010-03-21 07:22.

Claire Wolfe - prompted by a Detroit News editorial, Claire has a new political slogan:

Democrats:
The only party that can make
Republicans look good.

( categories: Politics | Humor )

No Trespassing. Really.

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Tue, 2010-03-09 07:14.

From tmm:

If you can read this, you're in range
If you can read this, you're in range

( categories: Humor )

Facebook Fan

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Thu, 2010-02-25 17:39.
( categories: Humor )

Entering Apple Restriction Zone

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Fri, 2010-01-29 14:52.
( categories: Politics | Humor | Computers )

Coverage So Good That...

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Thu, 2010-01-07 20:49.

Heard on the radio:

"Verizon wireless 3G. Coverage so good that it makes you a better person."

( categories: Humor )

Never a Year Like '09

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Fri, 2010-01-01 09:48.

JibJab gives a humorous send-off to 2009. [iOwnTheWorld]

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

( categories: Humor )

Shiny New Year!

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Thu, 2009-12-31 21:48.

Firefly fans: instead of saying "Happy New Year", say "Shiny New Year".

(Hat tip to KirsteninMT #shinynewyear)

( categories: Humor )

China Says U.S. Too Big To Fail, Offers Obama Bailout

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Tue, 2009-12-29 17:56.

Red Square at The People's Cube - Hilarious! I especially liked the postcards from the future, the best of which I included below.

Quote:
During the recent meeting with President Obama, Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao minced no words when he stated that "immediate action is necessary to keep a once prosperous nation" from falling flat on its face.

"If the U.S.economy collapses, so will China because we are so heavily invested in your country," said Wen Jiabao. "We thought we were investing in a nation of the world's greatest entrepreneurs, but a recent analysis shows that America has become little more than a home to overpaid union workers, whiney media, and spoiled welfare recipients. Our fears were confirmed last year when Americans elected you, Mr. Obama, as their president. But, to use one of your own expressions, America is too big to fail and so we will have to bail you out. This is no longer your decision. As your biggest creditor, we will now decide how to get the best return on our investment. You got elected on a vague promise of change; now we're giving you the specifics."

Greetings from Detroit

( categories: Humor )

Lost Generation

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Thu, 2009-12-24 08:04.

Jonathan Reed at YouTube - created for the AARP U@50 video contest. Placed second. A poetic palindrome. Read the lines forward for a pessimistic message or backwards for an optimistic one. Text copied below the embedded video.

Lost Generation
by Jonathan Reed

I am part of a lost generation
and I refuse to believe that
I can change the world
I realize this may be a shock but
“Happiness comes from within.”
is a lie, and
“Money will make me happy.”
So in 30 years I will tell my children
they are not the most important thing in my life
My employer will know that
I have my priorities straight because
work
is more important than
family
I tell you this
Once upon a time
Families stayed together
but this will not be true in my era
This is a quick fix society
Experts tell me
30 years from now, I will be celebrating the 10th anniversary of my divorce
I do not concede that
I will live in a country of my own making
In the future
Environmental destruction will be the norm
No longer can it be said that
My peers and I care about this earth
It will be evident that
My generation is apathetic and lethargic
It is foolish to presume that
There is hope.

( categories: Humor )

Thousands Protest Against Global Warming

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Tue, 2009-12-15 08:45.

Thousands Protest Against Global Warming

( categories: Humor )

George Bush: Miss Me Yet?

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Sat, 2009-11-28 07:15.

George Bush: Miss Me Yet?

( categories: Humor )

Air John Dillinger

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Sun, 2009-11-08 07:45.

Fred on Everything - Tears American Airlines, and US airlines in general, a new one.

Quote:
American Airlines is the only penitentiary I know that doesn’t just sit there stolidly on the ground. No. It has to fly around and inflict itself on the innocent everywhere. It’s every bit as dismal as Sing Sing, though, combining the elegance of a wrestler’s armpit with the curiosity of having the thieves on the outside, at corporate, and the prison matrons on the inside. I’d rather fly in a Dempster Dumpster piloted by a drunk, since dumpsters usually leave on time and are not owned by pickpockets.

It’s the world’s worst airline. And I’ve flown Aeroflot during the days of the Soviet Union. American has the morals of a Wall Street gangster.

( categories: Politics | Humor )

Make Your Own Flu Shot

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Sat, 2009-10-31 07:48.

YouTube - If I lived in Canada, I'd probably recognize this guy, but I don't, and I don't. Funny, though. And frightening. [militant]

( categories: Humor )

I Pledge Allegiance to the Obama

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Mon, 2009-10-05 06:34.

Rex May at The Libertarian Enterprise - unfortunately, the YouTube video to which he links has been removed, but the cartoon is still funny.

I Pledge Allegiance to Obama

For the search engines:

Quote:
I pledge allegiance to the Obama
of the United Obamas of Obama,
and to the Obama for which it stands,
one Obama, indivisible,
with Obama and Obama for all.

( categories: Politics | Humor )

Pachelbel Rant

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Mon, 2009-08-31 20:13.

Rob Paravonian at YouTube - playing the same eight quarter notes 54 times on the cello caused Mr. Parovonian to absolutely hate Pachelbel's Canon in D. Now he can't escape it, because that chord progression is used in many popular songs. Hilarious!

( categories: Humor )

Nationalized Pizza Three Years Later

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Wed, 2009-08-19 05:41.

Craig Cantoni imagines what would happen if the Obamaists nationalized the Pizza industry. [korwin]

Quote:
(Washington - 2013) The Obama administration's promises about the benefits of nationalizing the pizza industry have not materialized. Since the industry was nationalized three years ago, Americans are facing pizza shortages, pizzas in only one size and topping, and pizzas that taste like the cardboard box they come in.

When announcing the pizza program in 2010, President [sic] Obama had promised that pizza prices would fall, pizza quality would rise, and there would be universal access to pizza. "After all," he had said in his typical all-knowing manner that Americans have come to hate, "the pizza industry is much simpler than the medical industry, which we completely nationalized last year."

Before pizza was nationalized, virtually every American, whether rural or urban, rich or poor, white or black, or a race somewhere in between, could order a pizza customized to his liking and have it delivered hot to his door in about 45 minutes. Now, in the rare cases where someone actually answers the phone at one of the government's regional pizza kitchens, it takes six hours on average for a pizza to be delivered.

The cost of the standard 12-inch pizza is $140, or a 20-fold increase in three years. Half of the increase is due to the skyrocketing inflation caused by the president's stimulus spending in 2009. A dollar now buys only half as much as it did back then.

( categories: Politics | Humor )

Statism is a Religion

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Fri, 2009-08-14 18:06.

Dale Everett at Lost Liberty Café - a cartoon making crystal clear the religious nature of the state's claim to power. It's based on nothing but faith.

( categories: Politics | Humor )

24 Carat Gold Health Care Screw

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Fri, 2009-08-07 08:43.
( categories: Politics | Humor )

Virgin-Americans Vow Fight Against Cap-and-Trade's Blood Sacrifice Amendment

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Fri, 2009-07-10 06:11.

Iowahawk - a glorious, satirical romp with the cap and trade bill. [vanderboegh]

Quote:
In order to secure the votes of wavering Democrats, House leaders Nancy Pelosi and Henry Waxman inserted several last minute amendments to the legislation, including provisions for national oxygen rationing, witch burnings, dousings, and phrenology research. But the one that has seemingly stoked a grassroots backlash is the controversial Sexually Inexperienced Citizen Environmental Volunteer Amendment. The wording of the amendment calls for all American virgins over the age of 21 to register with the Selective Sacrifice Board, for possible use as victims in nationally televised vivisections intended to "supplicate the Earth-Spirits."

( categories: Politics | Humor )

Funny Fortune

Submitted by Bill St. Clair on Mon, 2009-06-29 09:01.

From Fre33 Agents:

Fortune Cookie: A can of worms won't open itself
Fortune cookie: A can of worms won't open itself

( categories: Humor )
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